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REVIEW – STUD Krisco Jock Thong in Neon Green

STUD Krisco Jock Thong in Neon Green

STUD Krisco Jock Thong in Neon Green

It might be the most hideous garment ever to exist and signify a giant step backwards in fashion and good taste, but like Joseph Merrick‘s mother before me, I just can’t stop loving it!

STUD are an Australian company, which represent the younger age bracket of circuit and Fetishwear. As a consumer who sits outside of their demographic, the clothes they make are generally confusing and disorientating to me, but this particular item caught my eye.

The Jock Thong, or Thong Jock, or V-Jock, or Bubblebutt-Jock, or whatever zippedy-zop name you want to give it, it’s a combination of the thong and the jock. The idea is that is lifts from underneath (like a jock), while separating and shaping the cheeks (like a thong), all while leaving you mostly naked (like a slut).

Annoyingly, it actually does do all those things and it does them quite well. But to me it still feels like when musicians make unlikely collaborations which clearly have nothing to do with admiration for one’s peers, and everything to do with money. Have they really “always wanted to work together,” or are they using someone else’s fan-base to prop up the sales of a terrible album?

That said, I don’t want to like unlikely musician collaborations, but I do. And I don’t want to like these underwear, but I do. They’re not even cool. They’re that thing beyond cool, where they’re so uncool that they’re cool again; somewhere just beyond Johnny Bravo and just before The Fonze.

Wafers wish they were as thin as the fabric it’s made from. The construction is bizarre leaving the front in an ant-eater-esq shape. And the colours… mm-hmm.

It’s new and youthful, which means it will sell in droves (this twat already bought one, and was stuck with this colour because the black and white was sold out).

Andrew Christian and Sukrew have done some smart, adultish, versions of the Jockthong too, but will never feel as rebellious as STUD’s. They fit true to size, and I very much doubt will survive an aggressive bout of gas, let alone a wash.

I bought mine from Clonezone (and was on sale as at date of publish).


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